Writer’s Block

I don’t know how many times I’ve pulled up the “add new post” window over the past few days and stared blankly at it. It’s not that I don’t have anything to be grateful for – because I do. It’s more that I’m having trouble deciding on a topic and articulating my feelings about it. I guess the best thing to do is just jump right in… the words will flow one way or another…

So let’s start with today. If you follow Ottawa news, you probably saw, heard or read this story about the collision of two articulated OC Transpo buses on the Transitway during rush hour today. My brother in law was on one of those busses. He was also one of the fifteen injured people who were taken to the hospital. His injuries are not considered “serious” and I’m extremely grateful for that. Oddly enough, he was on the bus today because he was in a car accident yesterday and is waiting to find out if the car is a write-off or not. Some woman blew through a stop sign while he was on his way home and smashed into the passenger side of the car. The police are pressing reckless driving charges on her. Anyhow, his shoulder was sore afterwards and today’s accident seems to have made it a lot worse. I know how much worse things could have been and am glad he’s generally okay though. My sister and niece are now saying they’re going to get him a crash helmet and wrap him in bubble wrap since things like this tend to happen in threes.

Yesterday (Feb. 6th) – I’m once again grateful for my CBT group. O talked about negative thinking and automatic thoughts, which was really helpful. It’s given me a lot to think about.

Feb. 5th – Superbowl Sunday! I’m not a big football fan, but we had Chris’ family over to watch the game. They brought a couple pizzas and a salad, we had some snacks, watched the game, chatted, played with Nathan and generally had a fun evening. I’m grateful for having fun with the fam.

Feb. 4th – I went to see The Muppets again, this time with Chris’ parents, niece and Nathan. His parents’ hadn’t seen it yet and it was a good excuse for me to get out of the house, which I’m grateful for. Since we were already at a shopping centre, I went to a couple of stores and FINALLY got a new pair of jeans! I know this doesn’t seem terribly exciting, but to me it was. I don’t quite fit into my old pants yet, and I am SO tired of wearing maternity jeans. I was very happy to discover that I am only one size away from what I was pre-pregnancy. So I’m also grateful for pants that fit properly!

Well, I think that broke my writer’s block. I need to push myself to write even when I have nothing to say, especially as one of the goals of this blog is to get me writing more regularly. I can’t make anymore excuses! 🙂

Support, Part 2

Earlier this month I posted about a post-partum group that I have been a part of at the Ottawa Hospital. This Thursday will be my final session with this group, which is bittersweet. I feel that I have gained a lot from this group and am so glad to have shared a portion of my journey with these wonderful women. I am happy to know that my finishing opens up a spot for another struggling mother to hopefully get as much out of the group as I have. Although I am taking a step forward, I do feel as though I am leaving a security blanket behind.

Today, however, I started a new group. This one is Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), which is a more systematic, goal-oriented approach. It will hopefully help me break some patterns and deal with the anxiety that I am feeling post-partum. I am thankful that I was able to get a place in this group and left today’s session feeling very hopeful. I also had a good chat with one of the other moms after the session, which was great. It’s really wonderful to be able to openly talk to someone else who I know is in a similar situation to mine and not feel inhibited by the stigma that is often attached to depression. I am very grateful for that too.

I am also grateful for you, dear reader. Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings and join me on my journey.